The knuckle draggers hate May's manifesto. Splendid. You can't teach an old dogma new tricks, just send it to the vet

  • 21 May 2017

Like the overwhelming majority of the voting public I haven’t read the Conservative or for that matter, any, election manifesto. They are window dressing. The various bribes and threats will be spun to destruction by all sides of whatever the argument is. Which is basically, C...

The scandal that undermines our once great system of justice

  • 10 May 2017

I never blog on cases, but today I must break my rule. Yesterday I discovered a scandalous state of affairs which could have led to an innocent man going to jail for a substantial period of time. I will not name the defendant nor the court for obvious reasons. In forty years o...

The two parties have become a bunch of cults. But the country is worshiping at the court of Good Queen Tess

  • 9 May 2017

Dear God another month to go. How much more can a sentient being take? Oh, I forgot. This is a aimed at voters. It is strange how the two parties have turned into cults. The Corbynistas genuinely worship him. He has come down from the mountain with his slab of granite and ten ...

Juncker is an old drunk. On power. Before breakfast. He is alienating member states and Remainers like me

  • 3 May 2017

This is an election of slogans. When May duck walked her way into another factory surrounded by a kinder of blue rosetted star struck adolescents, some jaded hack remarked that she might as well wear a fur coat and sing Rule Britannia. That rather confused the penned and irri...

If the Tory campaign slogan to the middle classes is, 'Labour will kill you whilst we will merely fuck you' there could be trouble

  • 22 Apr 2017

I have a deep gut feeling that this election is not going to play out the way Theresa May wants it to. ‘Hah,’ you smirk, ‘look at the opinion polls, Corbyn is toast, even the Samaritans hang up on him’. Well, maybe. I don’t for one moment think that Corbyn will win, but he wil...

Beware the words of Francis Pym in 1983, 'landslides, on the whole, do not produce successful governments'.

  • 18 Apr 2017

I can’t quite work out whether May is a political genius or as mad as a box of frogs for calling a snap general election. But she certainly has courage. Despite her 20 point lead in the opinion polls over Labour this election is risky. Not that Corbyn is going to get anywhere ...

Why Michael Howard's impeccable logic made me proud to be a knuckle dragging Xenophobic little Englander

  • 3 Apr 2017

I find all this fake news rather discombobulating. How can I tell what I read and see is true? Peter Hitchens and Simon Heffer demand we return to imperial measurements. Nigel Farage nearly joins the mile high club with a hard core porn star and £400 per hour hooker. Donald T...

The future may not be ginger but don't underestimate the Lib Dems

  • 2 Apr 2017

The tectonic plates of British politics are not quite moving, but are beginning to wobble. Brexit bestrides the political world like a colossus and like that mighty statue is quite capable of tipping gallons of burning pitch onto ships that are foolish enough to sail between i...

Osborne has become the real leader of the opposition. The only conflict of interests will be his and May's.

  • 21 Mar 2017

Who in their right mind would want to stand for election as an MP? The place is no longer any fun at all. The bars are empty and you witness the heresy of journalists sipping skinny lattes rather than downing pints of Doom Bar. I once offered one of those pasty faced children ...

Hammond the gelding Chancellor & Stugeon's bad case of premature ejockulation

  • 17 Mar 2017

I am a Tory. I want them to do well. I want May and Davis to negotiate a fantastic deal with Brussels. But I am beginning to to have more faith in Santa Claus, the tooth fairy and the Easter bunny. I won’t add Andrea Leadsom as she is a fictional character. Nobody that stupid ...